Wee Boy: mom what did you pass on to me?
Marley: what do you mean?
Wee Boy: like Canadian? German? Irish?
Marley: oh! Well let’s see I’m part Irish, part English, I think some German….
Wee Boy: oh. I was hoping you’d say Japanese so then I’d know karate
Category Life
Why I love mom
Wee Boy: Mom you know why I love you? It’s because you give me snacks, you give me good presents, and you have a soft tummy!
Batman Sequels
Wee Boy: So they should make another Batman movie and all his villains come back and Killer Croc is in it too. And they should call it….The Dark Knight Rises Again!
Christmas Presents
(Opening presents at his aunt’s house)
Wee Boy: Oh boy! I bet this one is clothes but that’s okay grandma don’t worry I’m still happy!
Painting Talents
Wee Boy: so grandma Lynn, I have something really gross to tell you. On TV I saw a guy who paints pictures with his penis!
Grandma Lynn: oh, I bet they aren’t very good.
Wee Boy: Naw…he just paints cubes with it.
Catching the Dog
Wee Boy: I think the dog crapped in the basement
Marley: really?
Wee Boy: well I’m not sure but I think she did
Marley: how do you know? Did you see it
Wee Boy: well I’m not sure. But what I saw was brown and smelled really bad.
What Chris Farley Taught
(Watching Tommy Boy)
Wee Boy: so is the point of this movie that if you’re fat and you dance, you’ll have a heart attack?
Quantum Physics and having fun
Wee Boy: time sure goes fast
Marley: well they say time flies when you’re having fun
Wee Boy: well that’s the thing – I’m not having any fun so it must be something else causing it
Taking Credit
Wee Boy: hey do you smell something?
Marley: oh god! Yes! Did you fart? My god!
Wee Boy: Well yes, duh! …sheesh what else did you think that’d be?
Living humbly
(driving in Hinsdale)
Me: dude kids born in these houses come into this world with a silver spoon up their ass, we want to make sure you are always down to earth
Wee Boy: Dave, that’s impossible. Kids aren’t born with things up their butts are they mom?
Musings From the Wee Boy 