Wee Boy: So Aiden have you ever been hunting?
Aiden: No
Wee Boy: Would you ever want to go hunting?
Aiden: No I don’t think I could shoot an animal
Wee Boy: Oh don’t worry, you get over that real fast.
Growing
Wee Boy: my bones hurt
Me: You know you might be going through growing pains
Wee Boy: what’s that?
Me: well as you grow your body might ache a bit getting used to it
Wee Boy: you mean I’m going to keep growing?
Me: Oh yeah you’ll be bigger than me some day
Wee Boy: ooooh I don’t like the sound of that
Manly Small Instruments
Wee Boy: Dave, I’m not going to play bass anymore. But I’ve been thinking of playing the flute but my grandpa says I can’t because flutes are for girls. Is there a small instrument like a flute for boys?
Frame Store Fail
(at the Frame Store)
Me: Bud don’t go back there it says employees only!
Frame store guy: Yeah that’s where the magic happens
Wee Boy: well…you SHOULD let kids in if you’re doing magic back there!
On Industrial Dance Music
Wee Boy: Dave this is really strange music who is this?
Me: This band is called The Revolting Cocks.
Wee Boy: Really? Are they from a farm or something?
Like on the Discovery Channel
Wee Boy (watching a documentary on dinosaurs with cgi dinosaurs “mating”): Mom! Look at that! Can you imagine Dave climbing on your back and doing that?! Sheesh!”
Purpose of Easter
My mom: Matthew do you know why we celebrate Easter?
Wee Boy: yes…it’s because Jesus is friends with the Easter bunny and he makes him breakfast after he hides all the eggs
Compliments
Wee boy: I love you mommy!
Marley: Aww thank you! That’s nice of you to say!
Wee Boy: I know
Boiling Down Dog the Bounty Hunter to His Essence
Wee Boy: What are you watching Dave?
Me: Dog the Bounty Hunter
Wee Boy: Oh…is he after a brown skinned person or a white skinned one?
Making Conversation
Wee Boy: So who wants to talk about how their day?
Marley: I will
Wee Boy: Okay! Well why don’t you tell everybody how much you weigh!
Musings From the Wee Boy 